The countdown is on. An email has arrived, asking me basic questions regarding my previous experience with silent retreats. (not much) and if I have any concerns (lack of structure I will admit to) An email duly comes back saying “thank you” and they look forward to welcoming me and will allocate a “spiritual director”.
I’ve asked Jesus to show me anything we might look at together – oh that might be my current fitful failure of a prayer life, or sad/angry/excited/happy with leaving my current job after 11 years – mixed feelings – or probably how challenging it is walking as a single person when you feel God says “my universe, my rules” to something you might frankly prefer as an alternative route through life. Yep, same sex attraction whatever………
Which probably means that nothing like that will happen and I will show up, read the usual morning bible passage, go for long walks, stare at the sea and take time to admire its crash and foam, listen to my ipod in a wind lashed hidden corner of the estate and get tediously bored!
A creative collection of pencils, pens, oil pastels and notebooks are coming with me, and my camera. The walking boots have been coddled with leather cream and wax after their Cornish salt battering.
I hope I get to talk to the lady who taught the journalling course I attended, as she’s responsible for the more creative riot that my neat and almost legible bible study/journal has morphed into. I still have a notebook for the very orthodox chewy morning bible study notes. Good to have a split personality.
I’m looking forward to the challenges that life is currently throwing at me from every direction!